Martyr for the cause
CHESAPEAKE, Va. -- A Mormon missionary going door to door was fatally shot Monday night and a fellow missionary was wounded by an assailant who fled, police said…
Talk about taking one for the team. You gotta know this was coming. Who hasn’t hidden from a Mormon or two in their time? Some people are just more proactive than others it appears. Now I’m not advocating shooting missionaries no matter their particular faith but when the black tie, pants and bike have become synonymous with obnoxious god peddlers it might be time to rethink your marketing plan.
Perhaps moving to billboards or funding large epic movies or perhaps a Saturday morning cartoon show with Murray the wacky flaming salamander and his adventures with his ole buddy John. I’m not saying I have the answers but somebody in the temple needs to start asking the right questions.
Not that this is all bad news mind you. Just think of the one that got away. You think this guy doesn’t now have the pick of litter when it comes to Mormon tail your kidding yourself. This guy is like a war hero. The only thing better he could hope for is that the wound is somewhere visible (not all that easy for a Mormon youth mind you). If so that guy is praying for the return of polygamy.
This also gives us a new tool in dealing with the great Mormon menace. Next time a team of cycling sky pilots alights on your front step, simply ask for a moment of silence for their fallen brother… and return your door to it’s upright and locked position.
posted by Sal at
1/03/2006 06:03:00 PM
2 Comments:
I do not wish to make light of a crime like this one. Shooting at ANYTHING should never be done unless the gun owner is completely sure that it should happen. It does, however, remind me of my grandfather. For whatever reason, he completely detested the Jehovah's Witness groups that would run around to evangelize on your doorstep. My Mother realted to me that he would wait on the porch (small farmhouse on the Texas high plains) with his shotgun. If they still kept walking towards the house, he would loudly chamber a round. To my knowledge he never actually had to fire a round to keep them away.
By
Phelonius, At
10:37 AM
"I do not wish to make light..."
Careful now, people will think this is a site for serious reflection of the issues.
'sides, if you can't poke fun of the Mormons who can you? Oh, right, the Baptists, Catholics, Buddhist, Muslims, Masons, Teamsters, vegetarians, Democrats, ventriloquist, philatelists...
By
Sal, At
1:07 PM
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